Always remember to smile (and in-between-ness)!

There's something really satisfying about photographying something that tickles you or touches you on the spur of the moment, particularly food! I don't know if it's a bit of a primitive thing because, after, we need food to survive or just something that says a little bit about who we are or how we like to indulge.

I decided to make the most of the bbq weather last weekend (who knows how long it will last?!) when my parents-in-law-to-be were away and indulged in a top notch bbq in their beautiful garden and spent the evening writing outside. Part of me felt bad and even a little unpatriotic as my HTB was watching England play their first World Cup game against the USA for the first part of the night ... but I had an intense desire to write.

This happens sometimes, particularly when I am relaxed and inspired and over time I have learnt that I need to make the most of this feeling; whether I am on a train journey or it is 2 o'clock in the morning. It often feels quite cathartic and seems to be a way of organising and de-jumbling my thoughts as well as something I just have the need and the urge to do; to keep me going. It was when I was sitting outside in front of the crackling fire burning in the chimenea outside accompanied by a glass of rose

and my bbq desert (bananas with chocolate inside melted wrapped in foil and melted - I wonder what that says about me?!) that I sat with my thoughts and smiled. A subtle smile to myself and at the same time a big content smile at the world from ear to ear. A smile at myself for smiling. And a smile at myself for forgetting to smile most of the time ... and I thought to myself ... I quite like this ... I really must remember to smile more often and make other people smile!

I recently came across  the work of the artist Flore Gardner in my research and her exploration into "in-between-ness". I find that it is only occasionally that I stumble across someone that is related closely to some of the ideas that I am exploring so this was a hidden treasure!

(Chiasmus, left and an image from the "Doodles" series, right)

Gardner looks at the link between thought and practice and in particular what she calls 'drawing=thinking' as an inbetween form that has its own language. She has written a great essay accompanying her recent show 'In-between-ness; Embroidering on History' at Derby Museum & Art Gallery where she talks about the process of how she adds extra layers of meaning to found photographs which she sees as fragments of the past where embroidery is used as a 3D version of doodling.

What I thought was really interesting - and also physically quite beautiful was how she uses continuously uses notebooks as a primary research space which is similar to how I use my research diary. She uses them to reflect her own nomadicness between France and Britain and uses a hybrid inbetween language which she calls 'Franglais' through the quasi-simulatenous presence of both languages and crossing over of double thought processes where the exact same thing cannot be said in two different languages. I was particularly interested in how she creates a sense of interconnectedness, crossing boundaries and spilling out onto the boundaries of the photos which relates greatly to Derrida and my own research of alternative spaces inbetween the masculine and feminine. These fragmentary interconnections also link to my notions of intertextuality and intermateriality; where a hybrid painting//writing practice could be a new type of language.

Reflections and (re)reflections

I have been writing in a research diary since I started my PhD in 2008 which started out as a way of subjectively reflecting and (re)reflecting on my research. I have always written a diary or journal, so this way of writing came quite naturally to me. Initially, it was to record my responses to my research, map out ideas and to create an ongoing dialogue with my own reflections and my research. Doing my PhD part-time, the research diary was also a really useful way of organising my thoughts and disseminating ideas.

Although I knew that it would be an important part of the research process, it has become something much much more, which I had not anticipated! My research explores ideas of hybridity and the interrelation between intertextuality and intermateriality; although I started off documenting ideas textually, the entries have developed into drawings, collage and paintings, in turn becoming hybrid. The research diary itself has become quite sculptural, embodying the concept of ideas evolving and emerging through processes of writing and making themselves and reflecting notions of l’écriture féminine and the in-between which provides a framework for my research.

I've also received some scary and exciting news ... I have been selected to deliver a paper at Space: the Real and the Abstract conference at The Centre for Art, Design, Research and Experimentation (CADRE) at the School of Art and Design, Wolverhampton University in July ... EEK! This will be my first paper delivered at a conference so I am looking forward to it and hoping this will open new doors for me! Better get writing then ...

Crossing boundaries ...

I spent the bank holiday weekend camping in Wales with my husband-to-be, which is something I haven't done since I was a child! Apart from the first day when we put up the tent where it was windy and rainy, we were lucky enough to have some really nice weather. We did loads of walking along the coast and the beaches as we were on a peninsula going through Morfa Nevyn, Pwllheli, Criccieth and Caernarfon.

We also went to Rabbit Farm on our way to Criccieth which had some really cute baby pigmy goats and alpacas! It was really nice not to have my mobile or any access to the internet for a few days and a really nice feeling to know that I was leaving everything in my tent when we went off for the day knowing everything was there when we came back! On the last night we had a BBQ and a fire on the beach accompanied by a glass of red wine watching the sun set ...

After returning home from my trip I have been staying in Chester with my family and noticed these two chaps in my parent's front garden!! I had to include a picture because it was really random ... the nearest water is the River Dee which is a good mile or so away so I guess they had been flying and needed a rest. They seemed a bit disorientated and spent the evening wandering around the garden and dozing. I gave them a bowl of water and some bread which they quickly devoured and then carried on their journey!

On Wednesday I attended the Crossing Boundaries Symposium in London at the Royal Geographical Society in association with Insitute of International Visual Arts which explored concepts of mapping and the interstices of cultural geographies, social geographies and the visual arts; blurring the boundaries of science and art. The symposium explored new approaches to mapping; counter-cartographies, repositioning, fragmentation and space, connectedness and the world as a multi-layered space. There was a fantastic key note by Professor Irit Rogoff who discussed cultural and visual socio-political re-mapping, language and the representation of a multiplicity of experiences.

The symposium ran alongside an exhibition at the RGS called Creative Compass and the Whose map is it? new mapping by artists exhibition at InIVA. I really liked Agnes Poitevin-Navarre's work and her 'Proustian Map of London' which was part of the Creative Compass exhibition. Mapping is a concept that I am particularly intersted in my own research but has not been explicity and critically examined in arts practice; I think I am more interested in it as a process rather than as representations of map-making. I also had a quick gander around the RGS library which was amazing ... there were maps that were around 800 years old written in latin and hand-made maps that included beautiful and ornate drawings as well. 

It was a really interesting and thought provoking day in which I met a lot of interesting people. After the symposium, I had to make the most of the beautiful weather and after a quick look in the Serpentine

Gallery, sat in Hyde Park writing my research diary and reflecting on the day; disseminating the many thoughts that I had.

Methodologies, sunsets and surprise gifts

I attended the bi-annual saturday conference at BIAD yesterday which is for the staff and research students across the Art & Design faculties there. The conference focused on methodology, which is something that is particularly important in my own research. I thought it was really interesting to discuss how method and methodology can emerge as the research unfolds academically; particularly in relation to epistemology and how theory and methodology can be constructed as you go and develop implicitly through experience and gaining knowledge. I think this is particularly important in art and design and particularly my own research which is grounded in notions of perfomativity and ideas unfolding and emerging in alternative spaces. I have also been asked to deliver a session to PhD students in the next academic year about methodology as part of the Postgraduate Certificate in Recearch Methods in Art & Design course that I took in 2008 at the start of my PhD which is both scary and exciting!

Making the most of the beautiful weather I went for a lovely walk in Cannock Chase on Saturday evening as the sun was setting. I saw loads of deer and rabbits as well! I really appreciate being able to go for country 

strolls yet being so near cities such as Birmingham and Manchester.

I finally completed a handmade book with photos that I took of my cousin-in-laws-to-be Nick and Suzy's wedding. They got married in March and I took some really nice photos and had been meaning to make

         

    

them a handmade book with a selection of photos for ages ... as it took about three full days to fully make, I became quite attached to it, but have now sent it off to them as a surprise! I think the photos of the book itself looks quite nice against my Cath Kidston tablecloth!!

Back in the game ...

Wow! It's been a while since I last wrote ... one of those periods where so much has gone on, that writing my blog has kind of taken a back seat for a bit. I had a great time in Germany at Easter and then back to reality as I began teaching the last term of the academic year at College and the last leg of my PGCE alongside keeping up to date with my PhD. I've finally handed in my PGCE now, yey! I'm really looking forward to the Summer and being able to make some work and crack on with PhDness.

I went to Manchester the other week and had a really fab day catching up with my lovely sister Corinne. We went to the Northern Quarter and Afflecks Palace and it was really inspiring seeing all of the vintage clothes and being surrounded by so much 'alternative' stuff that you don't really find in Stafford.

I had to put in a picture of THE most delicious cake that we had. And of course, as I had a fresh ginger, carrot and apple juice, it was all part of a balanced diet!!

I feel now that I've handed in my work that my head is a bit clearer and I can make some more work and immerse my self in my research ...

Hidden treasures/Versteckte Schätze

Hidden away and waiting to be found. Little gems, collected through time; each object holding its own history. At the moment I am in Germany, visiting my lovely grandma! The house is like a little museum  ... full of surprises and quirky little treasures. I always feel at home here and love all the little knick-knacks around the around the house that I remember from when I was younger.

We have just had afternoon Kaffee und Kuchen and recovering after an epic overnight ferry journey from Hull to Rotterdam. I have a feeling that my week here will leave me refreshed and inspired and leave me in good stead for attacking my research when I return home ... 

Honesty is the best policy

I have been so overwhelmed with so much stuff to do that I haven't written for ages! Sometimes, you just have those periods where you get so caught up in everything that you forget the things that are really important to you. Simple things, like eating well and remembering to smile! Everyday when I have been walking to work, I have been noticing that the sun is shining ever so slightly more, the days are getting a bit longer and flowers are starting to bloom, spring-style! The more I was honest with myself, the more I noticed these small bits of beauty ... making me feel more inspired and comfortable with myself.

I have however, started to work into some paintings that I did a couple of years ago with colour and stretched some new canvases. Maybe it was getting caught up that helped me? The writing//painting balance is never at an equilibrium and more like a pendulum swinging one way to the next. At the moment, it's at the painting end and I'm quite excited about it ... so hopefully there'll be some images to follow ...